TO BE CONCERNED WITH OUR NEIGHBOURS

XXIII SUNDAY IN ORDINARY TIME: Mt 18:15-20

We are responsible for our brothers

The first reading and the Gospel of this Sunday’s liturgy make it very clear that we are responsible for our brothers and sisters. There is a bond of solidarity between us that should not be forsaken or broken. We cannot pass by unconcerned, and ignore what is happening around us, as if it had nothing to do with us. 

This modern society of ours is very much individualistic, considering that nobody has the right or the duty to interfere in someone else’s life; and if they try, the remark comes very unceremoniously: Mind your own business.

Traditional wisdom

Sometimes, the traditional society leaned too much on the opposite direction, but it was very clear for them that what others do affects me, and what I do affects them. In Bemba, there is a saying: Icili pa munobe, cili pali iwe, that is: what is on your friend, is on you. What happened to him may happen to you.

The prophet Ezekiel tells us that God has set us as a sentry to our people, and when things go wrong, we must raise our voices and warn of the impending danger. If we avoid the uncomfortable task of challenging people around us, mainly our political and religious leaders, then we will be answerable for their loss, which is our loss as well.

Jesus’ instructions on brotherly correction

In the Gospel, Jesus instructed his disciples on how to keep the community together and on how to call the attention of those who need to be corrected. The first step, is a personal approach. It needs kindness and trust, humility and confidentiality.  If this first step fails, then we should involve two or three people more, who are trustworthy, friendly, ready to challenge and to be challenged as well.

In this aspect, I have learned a lot with the way most of the Zambian people try to solve conflicts in the family and in the community. Both sides are brought together, bringing with them their trusted friends or relatives, and then they go through the whole case, giving time for each one to explain himself and to answer questions. On both sides, people point out openly the failures and present what must be done to reconcile or to correct the situation. In the discussion, nothing is silenced or left hidden. That’s what the Bemba proverb teaches: Kabilo wa nsoni, taputula mulandu, meaning that a shy counsellor never solves a case.

Many times, it is hard and painful, but people who want to change their attitudes and reconcile, go through it. When that fails, the ones in authority in the community must be informed. And they must take their decisions taking into account the goodness of the individual and the protection of the community.